Keep Going Bro

(Or at least not let it ruin your day)

There’s this thing I do.
Who doesn’t?!

Anyway, I’ll lie in bed, and replay a conversation from earlier—like a glitching tape. What I said. What they said. What I should’ve said. Why did I say that? It just loops. And sometimes it’s not even that serious. Just… a look someone gave me. Or a text  that was never replied to. Or a text I did reply to that now feels weird in hindsight. Also the bills that don’t seem to be getting lower.

That’s overthinking, and it’s exhausting!

Overthinking isn’t thinking more. It’s thinking worse.

We like to tell ourselves we’re being thorough. That we’re just analysing. Being “careful.”
But it’s not careful. It’s chaotic. It’s like a mind trying to find safety by reviewing every possible scenario that already happened—or hasn’t yet.

And here’s the tricky part: overthinking feels productive. You’re doing something. You’re mentally “preparing.” But it’s a loop. A loud, spinning loop.

So… how do you stop?

1. Recognise when you’re doing it

That’s the first step.
It sounds obvious, but sometimes the loop has been running so long we forget it’s a loop at all.
You need to interrupt the pattern.

A tip I use: when my thoughts start spiralling and there’s no clear answer, I ask myself—“Am I solving something here, or just stirring it around?” If I’m just stirring, it’s time to pause.

Related read:

How to Stop Overthinking: Psychology Today

2. Get out of your head. Literally.

This might sound too simple to be effective, but physical movement changes mental patterns.
Go for a walk. Personally I like to pick up something heavy made of metal. Sweep the floor. Anything that reconnects you with your body.

There’s a reason so many people get their best ideas in the shower or while walking—it’s not about the activity. It’s about disengaging from the obsessive loop and letting the subconscious breathe a little.

Even stretching for five minutes can help. No need to be fancy.

3. Write it down. All of it.

I once wrote out 3 pages about some issues I had in the past. They were heavy issues in my volunteer work about other people I was dealing with.

But writing gave it shape.
Thoughts are slippery. They double back. They contradict. They stack.
Writing slows them down. Gives you something to see.

I even took the time to reevaluate my thoughts, and rewrote them into two categories: actionable steps, or things I can’t control. Whatever I am to do something about, became actionable steps. If I can’t, then I learn to forget about it. Marcus Aurelius even wrote it:

“You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”

Resource:

Benefits of Journaling – Healthline

4. Give the thought a deadline

This sounds odd, but hear me out because it’s new to me too!

If something keeps gnawing at you—give yourself permission to worry about it. But limit the time. Say, “Okay, I’ll give this 15 minutes tonight. After that, I’m done.”

You might find that, with a container, the thought loses its urgency.
Kind of like how junk food is less appealing when you’re allowed to eat it whenever.

5. Challenge the “certainty” in your head

Overthinking often comes with a kind of arrogance. A quiet, anxious kind.

“I know they were mad at me.”
“I just know this is going to go badly.”

But here’s the honest truth: most of what we overthink never happens. And most of what does happen? We handle it. Somehow. Not perfectly, but we do.

Try asking yourself: “What else might be true?”

This invites nuance. And nuance weakens the grip of black-and-white, anxious thinking.

6. Accept that you won’t always feel certain

This might be the hardest one.

Some situations won’t have closure. Some conversations won’t be revisited. Some people will never give you the clarity you think you need. And learning to live with that—that discomfort—is maybe the most underrated mental skill of all.

It’s not resignation. It’s freedom. Again, Marcus Aurelius quote from above.

Final Thought

Stopping overthinking doesn’t mean becoming careless. Or less reflective.
It just means learning when to stop spinning the wheel.

And if you take nothing else from this, try this one simple question the next time your mind won’t let go:

“Is this helping me… or just hurting me?”

If it’s the second one, give yourself permission to put it down.
Even just for now.

Keep going, bro.